“I am mired.”
“I am just one person. There is nothing I can do.”
“I want to give up.”
your Happiness researcher Who spent a decade in the study of well -being, I received hundreds of messages like this. I see the same feeling expressed, over and over again – but it does not have a name attached to it.
I want to tell you in her name: frustration. Although one word cannot change everything, it can start us.
When we cannot describe our emotions – when they feel brutal and prohibited and cannot be managed – it can lead to this Intensive experiences of shame and desire to isolate ourselves. It helps us classify our feelings to organize our emotional response, communicate with our societies, and recover.
The frustration is characterized by two basic experiences:
- inability: “I cannot deal with what is happening in my life.”
- hopelessness: “There is no benefit from trying, because nothing will change.”
The two are deeply associated, which inflates each other until you end up in a state of existential despair and isolation. Usually this is revealed:
- Something is difficult.
- You are trying to solve it, but you can’t. It exceeds the level of current confrontation skills.
- Feel shy and lose confidence slowly.
- You have difficulty seeking help because we live in a culture that tells people that they need to deal with problems alone.
- You feel that there is no way you will be able to solve this problem.
- Facing the crisis of meaning. I came to believe that there is no hope for a better future. You may surrender as well.
- You end up separating from others, making it impossible to recover.
Stephanie Harrison from the new Saeed
“The frustration epidemic”
While it was mostly studied in the face of people subjective Challenges, such as severe or peripheral diseaseI think we are facing the frustration epidemic today because of the society Challenges.
From the climate crisis to economic instability, we face problems that you feel large and are impossible to solve. At any moment, they may strike us personally, just as they did to thousands of people who were homeless due to Los Angeles fires. Or tens of thousands Federal workers who were demobilized With no warning, loss Their work, the purposeAnd the ability to provide their families.
The conditions were mature of this epidemic. I am in detail in my bookWe live in a world that gave priority to capitalist values, cut off our relationships and encourage selfishness as a way of personal happiness.
2 Our way we can “restore” ourselves
The frustration makes us retreat, further and further from what we need more: each other. Instead, we need:
1. Contact people and rely on them
The frustration cycle can be stopped if someone appears to help you overcome. This can be a therapist, colleague, friend or family member – anyone who says: “This seems difficult. Can I help you know how to deal with it?”
You need other people to wear ideas, sit with you when you are confused, to encourage and encourage you, and take you when you fall.
Stephanie Harrison from the new Saeed
People often tell me that they have no society. I completely understand. This is a natural result of Ancient happy culture – He who teaches us that we are not good enough, and we must compete, and that we must always succeed and achieve it (in socially acceptable ways), and we can not rely on anyone but ourselves.
You can start simply by gathering a few friends or co -workers with the intention of appearing for each other.
2. Take action and provide assistance
Frustration is the self -call: you feel impotence, so do not act, which makes you feel impotence, which makes it difficult to act.
When you feel helpless, it is a sign to help more. This is what breaks the cycle and shows you that you really have the tremendous power to change a person’s day for the better.
Start small: make someone smile, give him courtesy, or send them a funny video. Any help work It can affect someone else, and his witness ends with help You.
Then take it to the next level. Think about a problem that you care about, such as:
- poverty
- Mental health
- LGBTQ+ Rights
- democracy
- racism
- The exploitation of workers
- education
- health care
Write in a search engine:
(Edition) + (My City/City/Balad) + Organization
This must direct you to the organizations that have done the hard work of identifying a task and preparing a structure, Relationship buildingAnd access to resources. They need hands – your hands.
Send this email:
Hi, I (name)! I live in (Medina) and I am enthusiastic about solving/calling for (the case). I would like to give (time, skills, and/or money to your organization to help you achieve your goals. Is there a way I can participate?
Then they appear.
The reshaping of ourselves is a skill that we learn by appearing when it is difficult, celebrating ourselves when we do, and building systems that support hope. Under the appropriate circumstances, dealing with challenges leads to Trust, growth and meaning.
A society full of frustrated people cannot make a happier world. But a world of persons committed to reshaping each other, every day, really makes one.
Stephanie Harrison He is the founder The new happyOrganization for a new philosophy for happiness. She is an expert in happiness, speaker, designer and author of the book.Happy new: Getting happiness properly in a world of mistake“Follow it on Instagramand Tikhak and LinkedIn.
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